* Fast service Reliable, experienced workers $ No mess $ No fuss $ No delays! ■
/ spent three days cleaning up after them!
Broken sink, ruined carpet, damaged door, burst water pipe
They arrived at 3 pm still not finished after two weeks what about the damage, lost pay, etc?
Not when / had to take an extra unpaid week off work/
Already 10 days late In finishing!
Read models (a) and (b) on page 114 and find any examples of:
• unnecessary repetition of the same information;
• phrases taken directly from the rubric, prompts and notes rather than using the writer's own words.
Now read models (c) and (d), and find any examples of:
• phrases and expressions which are too informal for the type of letter required;
• phrases and expressions which are over-emotional, abusive or vague;
• information/comments which are irrelevant, or not given in the rubric, prompts or notes.
Which model is better,
Dear Mr Stubbs, Further to your letter 0/ 12th February, I am writing to notify you that the work on my house has still not been completed, despite your assurances that it would be finished in less than a week.
I feel particularly angry at having to take an extra week off work as a result of this delay, since this has meant my losing a week's salary.
Moreover, I am extremely upset at the amount of damage and inconvenience that your employees have caused me. Not only have they broken my kitchen sink and burst a water pipe, but the subsequent flooding has severely damaged a wooden door and destroyed one of my carpets.
I must therefore insist that the work is finished immediately, and that I be compensated for the damage to my property as well as the loss of earnings caused by your failure to complete the job within the stated time period.
I expect to hear from you by return of post regarding arrangements for the prompt completion of the work.
Dear Mr Stubbs,
Further to your letter 0/ 12th February, I am writing to express my disgust at the fact that the work on my house has still not been finished. Although you gave me your assurance that four days is the maximum amount of time needed for the job, it is still not finished after two weeks.
In your letter you said that I would be inconvenienced as little as possible and that disruption would be kept to a minimum. What about the damage, lost pay and so on? I had to take an extra unpaid week off work and I spent three days cleaning up after your workers.
You say in your advertisement that you have reliable, experienced workers, which is completely untrue! The damage includes a broken sink, a ruinea carpet, a damaged door and a burst water pipe, and they are already ten days late in finishing! This is certainly not fast service with no mess, no fuss and no delays.
I demand that the work be finished and the damage put right immediately.
Yours sincerely, HGIZotenta, N. B. Roberts t (
I am writing to you about an advert in your newspaper - the one for Stubbs Builders. The advert makes false claims and is really dishonest
I used this company a little while ago and believe me, they were terrible! They made a real mess of my house and were nothing like the advert. They were sloppy and caused such a lot of damage that I nearly fainted when I saw the state of my house!
I reckon you should drop this advert right away, be/ore other people are cheated by these cowboys.
To my mind they are a bunch of crooks and something should be done.
Dear Sir/Madam, O
I am writing to suggest that you withdraw an advertisement which regularly appears in your newspaper, on the grounds that it is misleading.
I recently engaged the services of Stubbs Builders to carry out renovations to my house, and found them to be thoroughly unreliable and unprofessional, in direct contrast to the claims made in their advertisement.
Furthermore, despite advertising prompt, trouble-free service, the company was in fact responsible for considerable delays, damage and inconvenience.
I would be happy to supply you with further details should you wish to contact me.
6 Read the following rubric, written prompts and notes, then explain the situation and the writer's objections in your own words. Next, read the letter on the right, which was written as an answer to task (b) but is twice the suggested length. Which two paragraphs should be omitted, and why?
Your town was featured in a recent TV documentary which showed the town in an extremely unfavourable way. You feel that the documentary contained a number of biased and inaccurate conclusions. Using the programme guide (1) and "Pick of the Week" review (2), together with your notes, write:
a) a letter to the producers of the programme, complaining that your town has been unfairly represented, (approximately 200 words)
b) a letter to the town council, suggesting that they should also write to complain about the programme, (approximately 50 words)
Drug addicts. were filmed in Swinburne, not Ambleton
Renovated historic buildings, not slums!
Programme Guide Tuesday 9/7
9:30 pm Forgotten Town
Third in a six-part series showing how some of Britain's towns have become no-go areas. Tonight: Ambleton
Pick of the Week: Documentary
In Part Three of this controversial series, the small town of Ambleton comes into the spotlight. A once pop--ular seaside resort, Ambleton has been beset by problems since the 1970s.
Michael Finch's team show all too pearly the effects of unemployment figures as high as 50%. Be preparedIfor, some shocking scenes of crime and drug abuse. Local people are interviewed, laying the blame for these social í 11 s_
firmly at the feet of immigrants. With the city centre rapidly becoming a slum area and the closing down of the hospital, together with the withdrawal of most of the bus and train programme asks, "How much worse can it get?"
Ambleton has the lowest crime rate in the whole area
Unfair to ■blame them -they are not troublemakers as suggested
One bus route withdrawn; train services have been increased
I am sure you are aware of the documentary "Forgotten Town", broadcast last Tuesday, which presented a negative and highly misleading impression of Ambleton,
The programme was grossly inaccurate in its suggestions of a soaring crime rate, widespread drug addiction, slums in the city centre and a faltering public transport system.
I have written to the producers to complain, and would suggest that you send a further complaint, in your official capacity, in order to set the record straight.
Obviously, the effect on tourism in the area would be disastrous if the image of Ambleton \ created by the programme were allowed to stand unchallenged.
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